In His Likeness w/ AntTBri

There are so many things about life and love that I don’t easily understand or readily embrace.  These things make sense contextually but practically seem impossible to do and be (when I try anyway). Having come to the Lord some twenty-eight years ago one would think my plight would be easier, that sitting up under the tutelage of men and women of God would have alleviated some of the pressure. And it has in terms of public Christian decorum, devotion, and dedication to the things of God.  My issue really is in maintaining such joy in my private experiences and encounters with God.  I do not know how to live and love an all perfect God, myself, or others from an imperfect existence. The disparities of this paradox discourages, discounts, and detract from my future desire and attempts when I don’t surrender this weakness to the complete finished work of Jesus Christ.

All these things keep me inquiring and interested in finding out God’s perspective on how I should live and love Him, myself and others.  I wish I could say that I now get it at first glance, that I now know exactly how to apply the principles of the Word to my life (in every sense, situation, and station of life) and that I am always winning, triumphant and overcoming my own frailties.  But I do not; this searching out often times includes bouts of struggle, a tug of war of the wills (mines versus His) that produces such desperation and dependency on the Spirit of God. I like many of you am surprised by the outcome of Him working through me. I believe that when we are at our best it is a direct result of our surrender, submission, and sitting with God. Maybe that should be the plight of what we aim to accomplish, ascertain, and aspire to.

The strength of my testimony truly is the things God kept and shielded me from. I am the sum total of God’s grace and mercy on, in, and toward flawed humanity.  One of the hardest things for me to reconcile was how to reciprocate a perfect love from a flawed existence.  It was not until I began to understand and embrace my weakness in light of His strength being made perfect in and through me did I began to live and love in the freedom of whom He created me to be.  Up until that moment people, experiences, my own reasoning and feelings spear-headed my life approach. This delayed my progression, denied my promotion, and daunted every promise. I’d like to suggest that if this is your practice you are experiencing the same discomfort or disconnect in reciprocating God’s love.

Relationship changed, transformed, and turned my life inside out. Living and loving from the inside out is the greater advantage and that’s the advantage I hope to encourage as we endeavor to live and love in His likeness. Allow the Holy Spirit his perfect work in you and you find living and loving inside out is easier than any attempt performed without Him.