In His Likeness w/ AntTBri

I’ve been praying for, about and concerning one specific area of my life and love for some time now. During the early stages of the discussion’s  development I spent alot of time just trying to vision what was in my heart to pray.  It was hard to fathom my hearts request before the Lord because I had no point of reference or measuring tool to predict a favorable outcome. So an enormous amount of time was spent fleecing the Holy Spirit.  God if this is you  then let…and then when it happened, I’d say OK if that was really you then this or that because it was just easier to believe I was crazy, imagining things and was wrong about what I was feeling entirely. I had to be off, misguided and duped by my own perception of what God’s best for me would be. So I prayed and prayed and prayed some more from every possible angle. It was this topic of prayer that manufactured, matured and matriculated my spiritual growth and faith to this point. 

Seems I’ve been talking to God about this forever, one would think the topic has been exhausted but it hasn’t it is still stretching, strengthening and supporting my resolve to fully trust my times completely in His hands. There’s so much I’ve gleaned through prayer, came to know in the Spirit over the years that I started to feel familiar, fatigued and foolish for persisting persevering and pressing to yet believe. While pushing past what my humanity feels Isaiah 43:19c vibrated in my hearing. Rather a version of the question “Have you not seen it”. Because my mind is first analytical, I began to mentally list what I’ve seen and contrast and compare it with what I still yet have to see.  I can’t even  begin to articulate how much  joy this brought me (brings me).  There I was thinking, feeling defeated, deflated and down about what hasn’t happened as of yet when the Holy Spirit began to illuminate all the firsts (given all this time) I still have to look forward to.

How blessed I am to have had the time to grow to authentically love my life’s assignment, to observe, interact and become actively responsive without actually engaging in the normal routes of becoming.  How clever and indicative of the Sovereign God to grace us with visibility, voice and vocation while maintaining the purity and propriety of at the appointed (set) time. How awesome it is to come to know that although you know in part there’s still more you will come to know about ones person, passion and purpose in totality.  Things yet to be discovered, things yet to be unveiled, things perceived first in and through the Holy Spirit that register and feel intense now but actually yet have to be experienced and expressed.

My heart is rejoicing over the actuality of life and loves progression.  In actuality I still yet have to see what life and love will look and feel like when things materialize and manifest. It is expectant, elated and energized by the possibilities of creating a life and love worth sharing.  

Yes, it’s been awhile since I first believed and began to pray about this. There has been some laboring, warfare, worshipping and work to align my will with God’s in preparation for what is coming.  Yes, the intensity of what I come to know in the present sometimes overwhelm me concerning the future because in my humanity I’m already feeling, desiring and yearning to be there.  BUT THERE IS comfort, consolation and compensation in the wisdom of God who originated the brand “now&later”. Abram, David, countless others and we the church have been given a now Word that materializes (manifest) later. This thought process can help you enjoy the in the meantime.  Thank God for the Holy Spirit who leads and directs us to God’s truth.  His truth reminds us, to stand, stick with and  stay the course while waiting because there’s so much more we still yet have to see and experience.

My eyes have yet to see and my ears have yet to hear what God has been preparing for me.  When asked can or have you seen it I hope you find joy in answering “I have not”~AntTBri